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| The first house we ever owned. Who knew it would be one of many? |
I recently made the transition from full-time professional to housewife, but I have by no means fully adjusted to the change. Theoretically, I am happy to support my husband by temporarily sacrificing my career in pursuit of his. And he is happy to support me, financially. As I’ve said before, we came to this decision in a very calculated and practical manner. And I always thought that once we found a more permanent home, I would go back to work.
Now, as rumors spread about our next potential move, I am realizing that it might not be any more conducive to a career for me. It might also be temporary. It might be in the middle of nowhere. It might just not be practical for me to have a career.
Before the judgments kick in, let me say something. This is not a “lazy” thing. I’m perfectly aware that I could get a job no matter where we are and for any duration. That’s not what I’m talking about. To be frank with you, it’s not worth my time to work at some crappy job just for the cash, and my husband agrees. I’m talking about the personal satisfaction of a career.
We haven’t actually heard anything substantial about moving or not, but the gears are turning to produce a series of “what if” scenarios. So I’m faced with the decision again, except this time it’s my job of housewife that is under question. While I bake muffins and clean the floorboards, I wonder what my options really are in a constantly temporary scenario. I may never be able to open up a business of my own, knowing I’ll have to leave it before I see any profits. I can’t take a job with any ambition in my heart knowing I’ll be leaving it down the road. It’s easy to find a job for a year or two, but it’s difficult to pursue a career in that time. I’m not prepared to take a “job” without a larger goal in mind.
Is it acceptable for me to find contentment as a stay-at-home oilfield wife? And can I be satisfied with that?
I COMPLETELY understand where you're coming from. It's hard when you realize that someone's career is going to have to come first, and when the oilfield and it's lack of consistency is in the mix, it's usually that one. I work from home for a tiny marketing/HR company, and will soon begin teaching hoop dance, but even so, I still feel like a housewife. Often I ask myself, "Is this enough?", and to be honest, I don't know. We just take it one day at a time, but I definitely fear the day that I am insanely resentful will come.
ReplyDeleteOne thing you can't do is let anyone else's judgement of what you do or do not do phase you. There are people who just won't get it, and that's fine. Ignore them. You know the life of an oilfield wife is odd and unimaginable for many, so tell them to take their judgement and shove it. We all do what is best for ourselves.
I'm so excited that you found me, so happy to have another oilfield wife blog to read! :)
Morgan, your blog is great! Just sat down and read them all...I have a lot of time on my hands in the evenings!
ReplyDeleteDefinitely speaks to my heart...what to do once school is over with in a month. Thankfully, be reunited with my husband in our new house. But what next? Do I attempt looking for another teaching position? Why this last one didn't work out so well and all my effort for 1 year doesn't seem worth it.
Decisions, decisions...
Thanks for sharing!